Trying To Get Home
by GreenPurple18
Summary: Our dear friends have somehow ended up in another world. How? They don't know... They'll have to travel across the lands and undergo difficult tasks to find out how they got there, why they're there, and how to get home. They'll also have to trust each other. Spamano, GerIta, UkUs, FraPru.
1. Chapter 1

Hi, friends! Guess who's back? Me!... Obviously. I am thinking - hoping - that this story will be awesome and you will love it. So, I got this idea while looking through some Dungeons and Dragons book-things. I don't own Dungeons and Dragons by the way. Oh, and if you didn't know from my other stories, I don't own Hetalia.

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Lovino had been separated from the others. This was bad. Of course, it was never a good idea to get separated from your friends in a forest, but it was worse because the forest was really creepy. Creepy like oh-god-something-is-gonna-jump-out-of-nowhere-and- eat-me-creepy. The tress seemed to loom over the frightened Italian, and all sorts of animals were calling out.

"A-Antonio? Feliciano?" Lovino looked around. He took a breath trying to clam himself, "Okay, if you're lost you're supposed to stay where you're at, right? You're not not supposed to panic, so stay calm, Lovino." he bit his bottom lip, "Someone will notice I'm gone, and they'll look for me, right?"

There was a rustle from a bush, and Lovino froze... Until the bush growled. The Italian ran for his life.

Hopefully, he would run into the others...

Antonio had forced the group to come to a halt. Someone was missing... His adorable, tsundere boyfriend was missing.

"Veh! How did we not notice fratello was missing?!" Feliciano cried out, "Where could he be?! What if he's been eaten or something? What if we never find him?"

"Feliciano, I'm sure Lovino is fine." Ludwig stated trying to comfort his friend, "As long as he stays where he is, we're bound to find him, alright?"

Al-Alright. The Italian nodded.

"Good." The German nodded, "Now calm down. Panicking won't solve anything. It'll only make the situation worse, understand?"

"Si." Feliciano nodded.

"So, should we just backtrack?" Antonio asked, "We need to find him quickly. What if he's gone off somewhere?"

"Ja, we'll backtrack. Hopefully, we'll find him and he hasn't run off. If he has run off somewhere than," Ludwig paused, "I hope he's okay."

"Luddy, are you even worried about my fratello?" The younger Vargas asked noting the German didn't seem concerned at all.

"Of course I am, Feliciano." Ludwig stated, his frown deepening, "I know I probably don't seem bothered, but I am. It's just best to think with a clear head, okay?"

"Can we go now, ¿por favor?"The Spaniard was obviously fretting.

"Ja. Ja." Ludwig sighed as they began their search for Lovino Vargas.

Unfortunately, the older Vargas had ended up even more lost... At least, that's what Lovino thought at first... Then he noticed an oddly shaped rock.

"Ugh! I've been fucking walking in goddamn circles!" The lone Italian groaned and sat on the rock, "I'll never get out of here OR find the others!" he sighed, "Why couldn't the potato bastard get lost instead?" he sniffed, "This is the last time I listen to that fatass American, damn it."

Flashback... Sorry

"Say, are any of you guys busy today?" Alfred asked as he sat in his usual seat at the usual table in the loud and crowded library.

"No, why?" Francis asked. The group had already discussed that they had no plans after school.

Well~ Alfred began, "I thought it would be fun to explore the forest behind my house."

"Eto, Alfred-san, what is someone else owns that and they don't want people trespassing?" Kiku questioned.

"Veh~ I think it would be fun." Feliciano smiled brightly, ignoring his Japanese friend's question, "Plus, I'm tired of doing the same thing everyday. Luddy and fratello will come, too." he looked from Ludwig to Lovino, "Right?"

Lovino scowled, "Absolutely no-"

"Ja." Ludwig interrupted the older Italian.

The German's answer made Lovino QUICKLY change his, "Well, if the potato bastard is going, than so am I. I gotta make sure he doesn't defile my brother."

"Well, if Lovi's going, than I am, too~" Antonio chimed, "Anywhere he goes, I go."

... "Fucking stalker."

Gilbert was next to agree, "I have to make sure mein bruderlein doesn't get in trouble."

"And I have to make sure GILBERT doesn't get in trouble." Francis sighed.

"I'm too awesome to get in trouble."

"Hm, well, since all of them are going, I suppose I will, too. Arthur stated.

"I'm quite curious about that forest." Yao began, "It's been giving off some odd vibes, right, Kiku? You'll come to check it out, too, right?"

Kiku sighed, "As you wish. I suppose I will." he smiled, "After all, I, too, am tired of doing the same thing everyday."

"So, we are all going, da?" Ivan smiled, "That is good. It would be bad if someone was left out."

Matthew sighed quietly, "I never said if I was going or not..."

"Well, you live with Alfred, da? So, I'm almost 100% sure you will agree." Ivan stated.

"Hey, commie, who ya talking to?" Alfred questioned.

"Your brother, you capitalist pig." The Russian replied.

"Why I oughta-"

"So immature." Yao sighed, "Can't you two act more mature during the last few days of school. Ivan, you're a senior for goodness sake. Alfred, I understand you're only a sophomore, but so is Ludwig. Can't you act a little more like him?"

No." Alfred replied instantly, pouting.

"Tch. Alfred, you git, why do you have to be so bloody annoying."

"Because I enjoy getting on your nerves, Artie."

Feliciano blinked, "Veh~ Lovers have odd ways of showing they care, especially here. Nobody ever acted like this back home in Italy." he paused, "Everyone was very honest about their feelings."

Antonio grinned, "I'd love to see Lovino being honest about his feelings."

"That's like asking my to fucking dye my hair blonde." Lovino huffed, "Not gonna happen. Ever." (2p reference? ;D)

"Antonio, I'll never understand how you fell for that tsundere brat." Gilbert sighed, "How the hell did you even figure out that he's in love with you?"

"Actually, he accidentally let it slip one night." The Spaniard replied, "We were kind of arguing over nothing, and he just blurted it out."

"Doesn't he break up with you, like, every other day?" Francis raised an eyebrow.

"¡No! It's not that often, and when it DOES happen, he doesn't mean it, so we ALWAYS get back together." Antonio answered, "Besides, most of the time it's because I say something stupid, but Lovi knows how much I love him."

Gilbert rolled his eyes in disgust, and Francis nodded knowingly.

Lovino was blushing slightly, "Uh, hello? Can we NOT talk about me like I'm not fucking here, damn bastards?"

"Now you know how I always feel." Matthew stated.

"Well, there ARE the select few of us who fucking notice you." Lovino pointed out, "So, you're not completely invisible. Now stop feeling so emo, damn it. It's annoying have to cheer you up every goddamn second of the day."

The Canadian smiled, "Yea. You're right. Thanks, Lovi."

"Tch. Yea. Whatever." Lovino scowled, "I-It's not like I purposely try to make you feel better, damn it, so-So-Yea. There's really no goddamn reason to fucking thank me."

Flash forward... Most of this chapter is in a flashback...

Alfred, Arthur, Francis, Matthew, Yao, Ivan, Kiku, Gilbert, Feliciano, Ludwig, Antonio, and Lovino were standing outside the woods behind Alfred's house.

"So, I figure if we split up, the exploration will go faster." Alfred stated, "And the hero already planned this. Three groups of four. he looked around, "Group one will consist of me, Artie, Francis, and Mattie. Group two is made of Gilbert, Yao, Ivan, and Kiku. Finally, group three has Feli, Ludwig, Lovino, and Antonio."

"Bloody git, why the bloody hell do I have to trudge through the godforsaken woods with you and frog-face?" Arthur glared, "Matthew is one thing, but I hate you and that bloody frog."

"Tch. And why do I have to go around with Ivan?" Gilbert snapped, "I haven't got a problem with Yao or Kiku, but that Russian is completely unawesome!"

"I'd rather dye my fucking hair BLUE than spend hours around the goddamn potato bastard!" Lovino exclaimed.

Alfred frowned, "Uh, one complaint at a time please. Okay, let's see..." he paused, "Um, Arthur, grin and be British. Gilbert, grin and be awesome. Lovino, grin and there's an image that I'll never get out of my head." he nodded, "Any more complaints? Questions? Concerns?"

"This is probably a bad idea, Al." Matthew spoke up.

"Hai, I agree." Kiku nodded, "I have a bad feeling about this."

"Let's just get this over with." Ludwig sighed.

"Veh~ Where's you sense of adventure?" Feliciano chirped, "It's not like we'll get attacked or anything."

"Yea. Besides, aren't all of you tired of being bored?" Antonio questioned, "This could be fun."

"Antoine, you think everything is fun." Francis sighed.

"Can we just go now, aru?" Yao huffed impatiently.

"Hahaha! Of course!" Alfred nodded and the three groups went there separate ways. Gilbert's group went in a Northeast-ish direction, Alfred's group went North, and Ludwig's group went Northwest-ish.

After about fifty minutes of death, the Italian's in group three wanted to take a break.

"At least a short one. Please, Luddy?"

"We're not goddamn soldiers, bastard. W can't go on forever."

"We haven't ever been going at this for an hour."

"Oh, Ludwig, surely a short break wouldn't hurt anything."

"I'd rather get this over with as soon as possible."

"Fucking potato bastard, don't make me beg."

"Fine, fine, A short break. Get ready to leave in ten minutes."

Lovino gratefully sighed and sat on an oddly shaped rock while Feliciano simply plopped down on the ground. Antonio smiled and sat on a stump beside Lovino's rock, "Isn't this fun, Lovi?"

"No." Lovino frowned, "I've got fucking rock in my goddamn shoes, there are godforsaken bugs ever-fucking-where, it's really dark in here, and I feel like I'm being watched, damn it."

"Lovino, you DO realize you didn't have to come, right?" Ludwig sighed, "You could've stayed back."

"And let you defile my little brother?" Lovino retorted, "I don't think so."

"How many times do I have to tell you that there's nothing between me und Feliciano?"

"You must think I'm fucking blind or something. I've seem the way you two damn idiots look at each other."

"Fratello, you're being ridiculous." Feliciano stated, "Luddy and I are just friends."

"Friends that want to be more than just friends."

"Don't worry, Lovi. They'll figure it out eventually." The Spaniard spoke up, "Hopefully."

"Idiot. I WANT them to stay the hell away from each other not become fucking boyfriends even though EVERYONE - including me - knows that they'll hook up sooner or later, damn it."

Feliciano blinked in confusion, and Ludwig blushed. The German coughed, "I-I'm going to go ahead. Follow after in five minutes." he walked off.

Lovino yawned, "Or we could follow after never." he sighed, "I really should have stayed home though."

Feliciano giggled, and Antonio smiled. the younger italian stood up, "I'm gonna go ahead and find Luddy." he skipped away.

"Just tell me when you're ready to go after them, okay?" Antonio smiled at Lovino.

"You go ahead." Lovino ordered.

"But-"

"Now."

"... Alright."

End of flashback... Yay!

Lovino frowned, "Then I guess I dozed off... It's official. I hate naps." he looked around and noticed a sitting on the ground in front of a tree, "That wasn't there before, was it?" he stood up and walked over to it. He knelt down and tried to open it. Surprisingly, it wasn't locked, and he opened it without a fight. Inside was a note.

Lovino Vargas,

Yes, we know it was you who found this, which is good. Inside this chest are

things that will help you in this world. The only way to get back to your world

is by saving this one from the evil that is trying to take over.

Good luck to you and your friends.

"What other things? This was the only-" Lovino took a second look into the chest, "What?"

The chest now held clothes, tools, and weapons or sorts. There was also another piece of paper that looked like a list. Picking it up, the Italian read it.

Lovino Vargas - Thief

-Armor

Chest - Tunic of Assassination

Hands - Master Thief's Gloves

Feet - Silk Boots of Theft

Head - Hood of the Tsundere

Legs - Leggings of the Italian

-Weapons

Dagger - Dirk

Short sword/One handed - Darkmare Blade

-Title

The Foulmouthed Tsundere

-Other

Housebreak harness

Lantern

Backpack

Thieves' Picks and Tools

"What the fuck?" Lovino was terribly confused. Should he go along with it or completely ignore the strangeness of it all? After all, someone could be playing a prank on him. Besides, the note said he was in a different world. That was absolutely crazy. And what was that about saving this world to go back? Nonsense. He chose to ignore it until he turned around only to see some sort of ugly creature. The bipedal monster stood around six feet tall, even though it was bending over and hunching its shoulders. It had short spindly legs, long arms that nearly reached its ankle, and a large pot belly. It had three fingers and a thumb on each hand and each ended in razor-sharp claws. Its body was covered by tufts of thick, wiry, black hair. It's head was almost equine in shape, but it had large, blood-red eyes. It also had large fangs, one protruding downward from each side of its mouth.

The monster - known to most as an Ettercap - leaped towards the Italian aiming to strike with its razor-sharp claws. Lovino quickly grabbed the sword - which he guessed was the Darkmare Blade - from the chest and stabbed the monster with one emotion - fear.

"Th-The hell was THAT thing?" A wide-eyed Lovino was about to start panicking. He glanced at he sword in his trembling hand and then at the chest laying motionless on the ground. He frowned, "Well, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in a forest with weird monsters, do what the note tell you." he sheathed the sword and removed everything from the chest. He replaced his shirt with the Tunic of Assassination, his pants with the Leggings of Italians, and his shoes with the Silk Boots of Theft. Then he put on the Master Thief's Gloves and the Hood of the Tsundere. He put his other clothes, the lantern, the housebreak harness, and the thieves' picks and tools in the backpack. Finally, he equipped the scabbards with the Darkmare Blade and dirk and slung the backpack over his shoulder. He scowled, "Ugh. I feel so fucking ridiculous, but I should find the others. Hopefully they won't question this get-up though."

_**End of Chapter**_

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Poor Lovino... He has no luck. He's an unlucky thief!

If you notice any typos, I'll give you a cookie with my name on it!

Reviews give me motivation to write more. To write quicker. To post faster.


	2. Chapter 2

Yay! It's chapter two of Trying To Get Home! I don't own Hetalia of course. That's why this is called a FAN fiction. ENJOY!

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Ludwig, Feliciano, and Antonio had stumbled across something interesting... Well, actually, Feliciano tripped over it. the item in question was a medium sized chest.

"Veh~ Should we open it?"

"Shouldn't we focus on finding Lovi?"

"I'm... Actually, I'm kind of curious about this..."

"But what about-"

"Lovino's probably fine. It's not like anything is going to jump out at him." Ludwig stared at the chest. something about it seemed to call out to him. It seemed to beg him to open it. He knelt down and easily opened it. There was a piece pf paper in it. Nothing else.

Ludwig Beilschmidt,

The only way to get out of this world and back to your own is

by defeating the evil that is trying to take over this world.

Saving the Middle Kingdom will open the gate back to Earth. In this chest

you will find amor, a weapon, and items to help you on your quest.

Ludwig, fairly certain that the note was the only thing in it, looked back into the chest and was surprised when he saw it was full. He picked up a second piece of paper.

Ludwig Beilschmidt - Myrmidon

- Armor

Chest - Iron Plate

Feet - Boots of the Natural Leader

Hands - Gloves of Annihilation

Legs - Leggings of Speed

- Weapon

Two handed sword - Nightblad

-Title

The Natural Leader

-Other

Backpack

Lantern

Provisions

Rope

"L-Luddy?"

"Probably just someone being dumb." Ludwig sighed.

"I don't care about what's in the chest right now!" Feliciano shouted, "I wanna know what that THING is?" he pointed towards something. Ludwig looked at what he was pointing as and was once again taken by surprise.

It was a grotesque, gaunt, lanky humanoid with long gangling arms and spindly legs. Its hands had three fingers and no opposable thumbs. Its fingers and toes ended in sharp claws. If it stood straight up it might be close to seven feet, but it appeared only five feet because it was hunched over at the shoulders.

This creature - known to us as a Gith - charged towards them going for the kill when Ludwig reacted quickly. Not knowing what he was doing, he unsheathed the two-handed sword and cut off its head.

"Eheh. Um, Ludwig, I don't mean to rush you, but could you hurry up and change into that stuff, so we can find Lovi as quickly as possible?" Antonio spoke up nervously. Concerned.

"J-Ja."

Soon, the three had restarted their search for the lost Italian. It hadn't even been five minutes when they heard a rustle from some nearby bushes. Ludwig stood ready to fight just in case, when who should make an appearance but Lovino decked out in his awesome outfit.

"Fratello!"

"Oh, Lovi, mi amor, you're safe!"

"That's a relief."

"Veh~ Lovi, what are you wearing?"

"You won't believe what I've been through." Lovino started before noticing Ludwig's outfit, "But maybe you will."

"Lovino," Antonio rushed over to his lover's side, "are you okay? You're not hurt, are you? were you attacked by a wierd creature? What happened?"

"Antonio, we've been over this... One question at a time! I can't answer a billion at once!" Lovino exclaimed, "I'm fine. I was attacked, but I wasn't hurt, alright?"

"¡¿Qué?!" Antonio wrapped his arms around Lovino's torso and pulled him into a tight hug, "¡Oh, Lovi, mi amor, lo siento! I wasn't here to protect you from evil monsters! Waah! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"Alright! Alright!" Lovino tried to push the Spaniard away but failed miserably, "I-It's not your fault, alright? Now keep your voice down, and let go of me!"

"L-Lo siento, mi amor." Antonio sniffed trying not to cry over his lover, "I'll lower my voice, but I'm /never/ going to let go of you ever again as long as I can help it."

Lovino groaned as he realized that the Spaniard really /wasn't/ going to let go of him until they had to move Even then, though, the oldest of the four would still hold his hand. Stupid tomato bastard...

"Veh~ Aren't we forgetting something?" Feliciano questioned, "Or maybe someone?" he paused to think, "Or multiple people?" he shrugged, "Or nothing. Or maybe-" he gasped, "Ah! What about Kiku and Gilbert and Francis and- and everyone else?!"

"Mein Gott..." Ludwig sighed, "We should regroup with them and think about what to do. They may or may not believe or current situation."

Antonio released Lovino from the grip of death and intertwined their hands as the group of four set off to find their friends before it was too late.

"Where the bloody hell is that fat-arsed git?!" Arthur questioned annoyed.

"Mon ami, if I knew, I would do something." Francis replied with a sigh.

"I hope he hurries back." Matthew voiced worriedly.

Wondering what the scene is? I suppose I should tell you. Arthur, Francis, and Matthew were in a tree. Trying not to get eaten by whatever creatures were circle the tree. Where was Alfred?

Who knows? He went off to find the path they had lost, and he hadn't returned.

The creatures? They were pale hunchbacked humanoids with pointed canine ears, black manes, and black shining eyes with maniacal gleams. If we know what they are, we tend to call them gibberlings.

Now where is the hero when you need him?

One of the three mangy creatures jumped, nearly biting one of the Brit's feet.

"A-Alfred, where the bloody hell are you?!" Arthur cried out, his accent thick.

"Hahaha! Have no fear! The hero is here!" An annoying yet familiar voice laughed loudly. Next thing anyone knew, bullets came flying from the bushes, killing the three gibberlings.

"Ah, mon dieu, we're saved!" Francis exclaimed as he, Arthur, and Matthew climbed out of the tree.

"Thanks, Alfred." Matthew sighed graciously.

"No problem, bro!" Alfred grinned walking into view wearing some... Peculiar clothing.

"Hey, fatass, I'm grateful and all really, but what the bloody hell are you wearing?" Arthur frowned.

Alfred took a piece of paper from his pocket and read it aloud after unfolding it:

Alfred F. Jones - Myrmidon

-Armor

Chest - Breastplate of Heroism

Feet - Boots of Avoidance

Hands - Stronghold Gauntlets

Legs - Hero's Legplates

-Weapon

Fireforged Shotgun

-Title

The Brash Youth

"Al, that's really cool and all, but where did you get this?" Matthew questioned expecting his brother to ignore him. You can imagine his surprise when he received an answer.

"I found it all in a chest." Alfred answered, "I came across the chest when I was looking for the path. I opened it, found a note, read it, looked back it the chest, saw this stuff and that list, tried the clothes on for size, heard Artie desperately calling my name, and came to the rescue like the hero I am."

Arthur twitched, "What do you mean 'desperately?' I was NOT desperate you imbecile!"

"Arthur, mon ami, you were very desperate." Francis disagreed.

"Isn't that a little irrelevant?" Matthew asked, "Al, what di the note say?"

"Um," The tallest thought for a moment, "just something about how the only way to get back to our world is to save this one from some evil thing that trying to take over. That's all." he ended with a shrug.

"That's all?" Arthur repeated, "Don't you think that's a little important?" he facepalmed, "You really are hopeless, you brash youth."

"What? Do you actually believe we're in another world?" Alfred raised an eyebrow.

"How else do you explain those creatures and the disappearance of the path?"

"I think," Alfred began with a frown, "we need to find the others."

"I hope we find them soon." Matthew stated, "It would be awful if they were hurt... Or worse."

"Oui," Francis nodded, "I must agree with you there. Let's go now."

And so, the group of blondes set off to find the others. Hopefully, it wouldn't be long, but... Isn't there a saying that says something like: You can't ever find what you're looking for?

Gilbert was bored. He'd never been so bored before. Kiku, Yao, and Ivan had found awesome chest with awesome things in them, but Gilbert hadn't found a thing.

Gilbert kicked a rock. He had no idea where the others were. It was annoying and unawesome. He was just following the sound of chattering. He didn't care what the chattering was about. He just wanted to know where he was. He had a feeling he wasn't in Alfred's backyard anymore.

The chattering gradually grew louder. Finally, he stumbled across two men with in strange outfits. Gilbert would have said the clothes were out of this world, but he wasn't even sure he was in his world at all.

"I saw them."

"Who?"

"Them. They weren't from Gle'kia or here. They were from Earth."

"That's good, right? Gle'kia is the Middle Kingdom's enemy. Aren't those from Earth supposed to be allied with us?"

"Yea, but Earth has lost all knowledge of Conroe and Gle'kia, remember? All twelve of them are lost and confused, and only half of them have found their chests."

"Which six?"

"Hmm... Lovino Vargas, Ludwig Beilschmidt, Alfred F. Jones, Ivan Braginski, Yao Wang, and Honda Kiku."

"Those names... So, it IS true. Amazing! People from the Eastern Land have returned to the Middle Kingdom to save it from the Western World!"

"I wonder how they got here though... The Border Gates don't just randomly open, do they?"

"Um... I don't know. No one has ever really explained the gates to me."

"Oh, well, should we rush off to the King and tell him about the humans?"

"Yea. Definitely!"

The two strange males went off in the same direction. Gilbert was now even more confused but decided the conversation he overheard would come in handy. He now had information that he should share. He was useful again. The self-proclaimed Prussian turned around and grinned, "Awesome!"

Right in front of him was a chest that wasn't there before. He opened it with ease and read the note.

Gilbert Beilschmidt,

Blah, blah, bah, save this world to return to your own.

Yada, yada, yada. Same old story.

He looked back into the chest and his grin grew. Piece of paper number two read:

Gilbert Beilschmidt - Gladiator

- Armor

Chest - Tunic of Cataclysm

Feet - Ego's Boots

Hands - Gladiator's Mail Gauntlets

Legs - Leggings of Speed

-Weapon

Two handed sword - A Prussian's Awesome Sword

-Title

The Arrogant Crude Crusher

- Other

Backpack

Grappling hook

Weaponblack

Provisions

"Double awesome!"

You know the drill. Gilbert changed. However, instead of fighting monsters like those before him, we went on the hunt for his friends. He walked around for a while but found no trace of any other human from Earth.

Ludwig, Lovino, Feliciano, and Antonio had not found their friends, but they'd stumbled across what appeared to be a small town. A small town that didn't take kindly to strangers.

"Oi, stop fucking poking me that goddamn thing already!" Lovino shouted motioning at the spear.

"Veh! Whatever it is that you're angry at us for, we didn't do it, so please don't hurt us or lock us up or kill us! Please, oh please!" The younger Italian cried hiding behind the German.

"H-Hey, maybe you could let us explain some stuff before you decide to do something rash?" Antonio chuckled sheepishly.

"We don't take kindly to strangers." A female stated. These people were taller than average and had oddly pointed ears. She continued, "You'll be put in the dungeon until my father returns."

"When will he be back?" Ludwig sighed trying to stay calm. It was very difficult.

"It depends." The woman began, "It could be hours, days, or even weeks." she looked them over again, "I don't not know where you're from, and I don't not care." she turned around, "If you need anything, you may call for me. My name is Lídia." she walked away, "Take them to the dungeons now."

_**End of Chapter**_

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Uh-oh, looks like Feli, Lovi, Toni, and Luddy have run into trouble... Will they be okay? Will the groups EVER be reunited? Will Alfred ever get rid of his hero complex? If I tell you now it will ruin everything, won't it? So, stay tuned for the next exciting episode.. erm... chapter of Trying To Get Home!


	3. Chapter 3

Hi, hi! Guess who's back! Back again! The awesome GreenPurple18, who does NOT own Hetalia, has returned, friends! She has returned with another chapter of Trying To Get Home! What will happen in THIS chapter, I wonder. Read to find out!

* * *

Kiku look around, "Not only does the forest never end, but it's supply of monsters refuses to cease as well."

"I'm tired of all this fighting, aru!" Yao exclaimed.

The Russia smiled, "Oh, surely you exaggerate, da? Though I DO wonder where Gilbert went..."

"He shouldn't have run off, aru! We'll never find him!" Yao huffed, "And what about the others, aru? Where's Opium?"

"Stop calling me that, you git!"

Kiku, Yao, and Ivan looked towards the voice and saw Arthur, Francis, Matthew, and Alfred.

"Ah, it is good to see you re all still alive." Kiku smiled, "I see Alfred has found his chest."

"Well, what's a hero without his equipment?" Alfred grinned, "I'm glad you guys are in one piece, too, but..." he looked around, "Where's Gilbert?"

"We don't know, aru." Yao replied honestly, "He went off on his own when we weren't looking, and now we're afraid he might be lost or worse, aru."

"We also don't know about Ludwig's group." Ivan added.

"I cannot help but feel like something bad has happened to Ludwig-san and the others." Kiku sighed.

"Eh? Something happened to West?!"

The seven looked at the newcomer only to see Gilbert the Awesome Prussia running up.

"I-It's only a feeling, Gilbert-san." Kiku began but was drowned out by Yao.

"Aiyaa! Where have you been?! Why'd you run off like that, aru?!"

"Sorry, sorry, no need to yell." Gilbert held his hands up in defense.

"You idiot, you could have been killed!" Francis shouted, "There can't be a Bad Friends Trio if one friend is dead! It would be the Bad Friends Duo, and that is not - what would you say - awesome, especially since you're the self-proclaimed awesomest member! Yet, all you can say is that you're sorry and that there's no need to yell?!" he frowned, "You are so careless."

"I knew I was gonna be okay..." Gilbert shrank back. He wasn't really used to Francis yelling at him.

"You didn't even have any equipment when you left, aru." Yao sighed.

This made Francis angrier, "You mean you didn't even- I'm going to kill you when we get back to our world!"

"Hey, maybe we should worry about finding the other four...?" Matthew spoke up.

"That's a good idea." Alfred nodded, "Kiku might've been right about them being in trouble. His hunches usually aren't wrong, right?" he looked at Kiku, Yao, Ivan, and Gilbert, "But first, what are you guys?"

"What do you mean, aru?"

"I'm a - what was it called - myrmidon. My title is the Brash Youth."

Kiku nodded, "I'm a samurai. My title is the Sneaky Thinker."

"I'm a mage, and my title is the Oldest One, aru." Yao stated.

Ivan smiled, "I am a myrmidon as well, but I am the Scary One, da. I do not think I am scary though..."

"I am gladiator. The Arrogant Crude Crusher." Gilbert said, "Arrogant. Bah! It's not MY fault I'm so awesome."

Arthur nodded, "Now we really should find the others. We probably should split up... Where should we start?"

No one spoke up, so Gilbert replied, "Um, I saw a town when I was wondering around."

"Well, they may have went there, so let's go." Francis nodded, "Lead the way, Gilbert, and don't wander off anymore."

"Well, with that arrogant twit leading the way, we're sure to die." Arthur sighed earning a glare from the Arrogant Crude Crusher.

Ludwig, Feliciano, Lovino, and Antonio were bored. The older Italian decided to take this time to practice his lock-picking skills, but-

"Damnit! Fucking door, unlock!"

-It wasn't going so well...

"Lovino, maybe you should give up for a while." Ludwig sighed knowing that this wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

The guards had taken Ludwig and Lovino's bags and weapons, but the older Vargas brother had been able to reach his belongings.

Where were the guards now? Who the hell knows...?

"Shut the hell up, potato bastard!" Lovino shouted, "I'll get it eventually!"

"What are we going to do when- if you do? There's a whole town out there, and only two of us have weapons." Ludwig began, "The odds are completely against us, so it's best if we just stay put until Lídia's father returns."

"Even though that could be in months." Feliciano foolishly spoke up.

"That's not fucking helpful, idiot." Lovino mumbled, "I don't want out in a fucking month or so! I want out now!"

"Lovi, mi amor, I don't think yelling is going to help very much." Antonio piped up.

"Hey, you four have company." A guard opened the door leading to freedom and led eight familiar people inside. He payed no mind to Lovino's tools and picks. Instead, he just unlocked the cell door and the eight people walked in. The guard locked the cell door and put the key in his back pocket and turned around, "We've just received word that Ivoron, Lídia's father, will return in a month. Have fun until them." He laughed and left closing the door to freedom behind him.

"Sooo..." Alfred began slowly before grinning, "How have y'all been?"

"It appears Kiku was right about something bad happening to you four." Athur sighed, "Now it seems something bad has happened to ALL of us."

Yao grimaced, "Did he say we're going to be in here for a month, aru? For what?"

"They don't... Take kindly to strangers." Ludwig replied, "I think that an inane reason for locking people up."

"Eh?! No, no, no! They can not keep me locked in here for a month!" Francis began fretting, "I'm too beautiful to be locked up for that long. I'm too beautiful to be locked up at all! ... Unless one is into that sort of thing, but this is not the case... Besides, I can't be locked up with Eyebrows. It's not good for my health."

"Will you shut the fuck up?" Lovino glared.

"Aren't you worried, aru?" Yao questioned, "Surely you want out."

"Of course I want out, and never call me Shirley."

"So, you have a plan, da?" Ivan kept on smiling.

"Can I be the hero?!" Alfred jumped.

"Shut up, you fobbish twit." Arthur huffed.

"Maybe we should just listen to Lovino." Matthew went unheard as usual.

"Does your plan involve me being awesome?" Gilbert grinned.

Francis rolled his eyes, "It involves us getting out. That's what matters."

"So, what's your plan, Lovi?" Antonio stood up.

"Eto, do you even have one?" Kiku asked politely.

"Veh~ Big brother to the rescue!" Feliciano cheered.

"Gott, mein head hurts." Ludwig groaned.

Lovino twitched, "I got the goddamn key." he held out the cell key, "That's all I wanted to fucking say. All that stupid ass shit really wasn't fucking necessary, damn."

... "Yo, Lovino, what's your class? And your title?" Alfred scratched his head.

"The Foulmouthed Tsundere thief."

"That explains a lot." Alfred nodded, "What about you, Ludwig?"

"A myrmidon. The Natural Leader."

"Oh, cool! So am I, bro! But I'm the Brash Youth."

"I'm not your bro..."

"Well, not by blood sure, but we're friends, right?"

"... Oh, Gott..."

Lovino almost laughed, "I think I like the hamburger bastard a little. He really good at annoying the potato bastard."

"Is Lovi making friends?"

"Allies."

"Oh, well, okay."

Ludwig sighed, "I'd like to know what the rest of you are, so I'll know what I'm working with." In agreement, the other the other four who had found their chest told their class and title. Ludwig nodded, "Right. Well, since Lovino has the cell key, I believe we should think of an actual plan."

"Veh~ What's your course of action, Mister Natural Leader, sir?" Feliciano mock saluted earning chuckles from a few of the others.

The blonde German gave a small smile before sighing, "Simple. We wait until night and run."

"Well, there ARE some of us who are quite talented at running away." Arthur began, "Frogface and the Italians."

"Thank you." The mentioned three nodded.

"So, we're running?" Alfred clarified, "That does sound very-"

"I swear to God if you say heroic I will kill you!" Arthur interrupted.

"Doesn't sound very awesome." Gilbert changed the American's sentence, so Arthur couldn't kill him.

The Brit sighed, "Why do I bother?"

"Good question." Alfred grinned as Gilbert was snickering.

"You're a glutton for punishment, Alfred." Arthur was not amused in the slightest.

"Can we at least ATTEMPT to get along?" Ludwig sighed.

Eventually, the sun went down, and the town became even more silent. Not even the crickets were chirping. Lovino unlocked the cell door as Ludwig began speaking, "We need to make sure there are no guards out there." Ludwig began, "And if they are, hopefully they'll be asleep." he looked at the other eleven in thought

"Veh~ We should send Matthew." Feliciano spoke up, "No one would notice him, and he's really quiet."

"Is that okay with you?" Ludwig looked at the Canadian.

"It's fine." Matthew wouldn't admit that the oblivious Italian's words insulted him a bit. Why was he only remembered if something was needed? He opened the door to freedom slowly and quietly. He poked his head outside to look around, "It's okay. There's no one out here."

The twelve companions walked outside, and they quietly left town after deciding to follow a road that led to a city called Midría City. They stayed on the path conversing all the way.

"Anyone know the name of that hostile town?" Alfred asked.

"I think I saw a sign that said it was called Russoe Town, aru." Yao replied.

"I wish we knew more about this place." Antonio sighed.

"I just wish I could remember what I was going to tell you guys." Gilbert groaned, "I'm pretty sure it had to do with this world..."

"When you do, tell us immediately." Ludwig ordered.

"Ja, ja, don't worry." The albino waved him off, "And stop going army drill Sargent on everyone. It's not awesome at all, and it's not gonna win Feli's heart."

"Was?"

"Veh~ I wanna go home!" Feliciano whined.

"We all do, Feliciano-kun." Kiku replied, "I'm sure we'll get home soon... I think."

"I'll never fucking listen to that hamburger bastard again." Lovino mumbled.

"Oh, lighten up, Lovi." Antonio smiled, "At least we're not being attacked."

"Antonio, shut up, and don't bloody jinx us!" Arthur shouted.

The Spaniard sighed and rolled his eyes, "Why so skeptical, Brit?"

The Brit glared, "It would do you some good to be a little more suspicious, ya damn Spaniard."

Alfred sighed, "Hey, Artie, c'mon. Chill, alright? 'Tonio was just trying to cheer Lovino up a little."

Arthur glared at the American, "Well, he shouldn't be so optimistic! We're in some unknown world with no way or idea how to get home. Now stop calling me Artie! My name is Arthur, you damned git."

Alfred flinched slightly, "You're just tense. You really should calm down. Take a deep breath and count to ten."

"Will the two of you stop your lovers' quarrel?" Francis sighed, "Gilbert has remembered what he wanted to say."

"We're NOT bloody lovers, frogface!"

"You should be."

"Shut the hell up!"

"Why? I'm only speaking the truth. The two of you WILL end up together sooner or later. Hopefully sooner."

"I don't bloody love him, dammit!"

"Your words don't wound me, but I bet they hurt poor Alfred."

The only one of the twelve that was born in America spoke up, "What? Francis, don't be ridiculous. Now shut up, so we can listen to Gil." It was obvious that Alfred was upset. His smile was incredibly fake, and he wasn't doing a good idea of hiding the pained expression.

Arthur made no mention of that, "A-Anyway, what did you want to say, Gilbert?"

"Well, when I was wondering around, I overheard two people talking." The palest of the twelve began, "Apparently, Gle'kia, the Western World or something like that, is evil. Conroe, which is the Middle Kingdom, is allies with Earth. We're in Conroe right now. Earth lost all knowledge of Gle'kia and Conroe for some odd reason. We got here because of something called a Border Gate." he paused, "I'm not sure what those are..."

"So, if we had told those people back there we are from Earth, they would've let us go?" Matthew questioned.

"They probably wouldn't have believed us." Ludwig shook his head.

"Hey, why don't we just find the gate back to our world?" Arthur asked.

"I think one of the guys said they don't just randomly open." Gilbert began, "Besides, we don't even know what they look like."

"Plus, it wouldn't be very heroic to just leave even though we have no idea what's going on." Alfred added.

"Well, I hope we are able to come to some sort of agreement, da." Ivan stated, "I would hate to be arguing on our whole journey."

"Even if they agree on this, they'll find something else to fight about, aru." Yao sighed, "They're like immature children."

"Eto, perhaps one day, they'll agree on something." Kiku sweat-dropped, "Or at least, eto, learn how to compromise."

"I wonder how far Midría is." Matthew sighed. Of course, he didn't get a reply from anyone.

Two hours later, they HAD to take a break. Ludwig had been carrying Feliciano, Antonio had been carrying Lovino, Alfred was whining, Arthur was grumbling, Ivan was kolkol'ing, Yao was complaining, Gilbert was looking pissed, and it was too dark to see.

"I don't really see how we're going to do this." Antonio sat Lovino down.

"We don't have anything to set up a camp." Ludwig agreed.

Kiku began listed their supplies, "Eto, I believe we have five backpacks, four lanterns, three ropes, provisions, a housebreak harness, thieves' picks and tools, locks, a grappling hook, and weapon-black."

"Like I said, "Ludwig began, "we don't have anything to set up a camp."

"Oi, potato bastard, are you gonna put my brother down now?" Lovino raised an eyebrow.

Feliciano, who was on the German's back, yawned, "Actually, I'm very comfortable right here."

Ludwig gave Feliciano a look. the younger Italian countered with an irresistible pout. It was super effective! And this is not Pokémon! anyway, Ludwig sighed and looked back at Lovino, "He said he's comfortable."

"D'aww~ Ludtz can't say no to Feli-kins!" Gilbert laughed, "Kesesesese! I didn't realize you'd fallen so hard, Bruderlein!"

"I-I CAN say no to Feliciano!" Ludwig blushed, "A-Also, I have not fallen for anyone!"

"Ohonhon! It appears that dear, little Ludwig hasn't even realized how in love with sweet, innocent Feli." Francis smiled, "Young love can be so adorable."

"I hope they realize it soon." Antonio sighed, "Then Lovi can stop trying to pull them apart in order to push them together."

"Fucking bastard." Lovino huffed.

Antonio sat against a tree and pulled Lovino into his lap, "I'm sure they'll figure it out on their own."

"I- You know what? Just shut up." The older Italian leaned back in order to get comfortable.

Basically, everyone - except Lovino, who slept leaning against Antonio - slept leaning against a tree.

_**End of Chapter**_

* * *

Because who doesn't love sleeping against a tree, huh? I know it's MY favorite pass-time... Nah, I'm kidding. Don't you wonder what will happen when the get to the next city? I already know, but I'm not going to tell you because I'm just that evil! Mwahahaha!

... Well, you'll find out soon enough... Review? Not only do that motivate me to write more, but they also make me nicer...


	4. Chapter 4

Whoo-hoo! Chapter four of Trying To Get Home! Have you been looking forward to this? I know I have! What questions - if any - will be answered in THIS chapter? Read to find out because I'm not going to tell you here because I don't own Hetalia!

... Don't question my reasoning...

* * *

Ludwig was up before the sun was. Why? He was uncomfortable. He watched over those he could see, especially Feliciano... Okay, you got me. He had his eyes on Feliciano /only./ He hated the others picking on him and saying he was in love with Feliciano because he really /was/ in love with the younger of the Vargas brothers.

Of course, he'd never tell a soul... Unless somehow he were to muster up the courage to admit to Feliciano, but... The blonde German was a coward when it came to such things... Talk about an odd sentence.

Ludwig shook his head, "I should be thinking about getting home, not..." he looked back at Feliciano, "Sooner or later, they'll change my title from the Natural Leader to the Lovesick Fool Who Talks To Himself..."

"Kesesesese! So, West, why haven't you told him yet?" Gilbert made himself known, "Seems to me that the feeling is awesomely mutual. What's holding you back? Other than a slight case of unawesomeness."

"B-Bruder!" Ludwig went wide-eyed.

"The awesomest Bruder /ever/ at your service." The paler of the two grinned. His grin turned to a frown at record speed, "Seriously, when are you gonna tell Feli-kins how you feel?"

"Never." The blonde stood up so he wouldn't have to look up at his brother, "Feliciano doesn't feel the same, and I don't want to make our friendship awkward."

"You mean /more/ awkward than it already is?" Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Honestly, if you don't tell him yourself, I'll gladly and awesomely tell him for you."

"Wha- Nein, you can't! I will! Later! Much later!"

"Promise?"

"Ja, ja! Promise!"

"Gut, now stop yelling or you'll wake the others, and they'll be mad at you."

"E-Es tut mir leid."

Eventually, of course, everyone had to wake up, so the Beilschmidt brothers took the task of waking them up. None of them were exactly thrilled to be awoken from their slumber, but they knew they had to move on.

"You know, I don't really remember where we're going." Alfred yawned as they began to move.

Midría City." Arthur replied, "Honestly, when they chose your title, they did a smashing job."

"Oh, who asked you?" Alfred huffed.

"Can we PLEASE get along?" Yao snapped, "You're giving me a terrible headache, aru." Somebody isn't a morning person...

"Eto, arguing will get us nowhere except in trouble." Kiku added, "It's best to quit while you're ahead."

"What's the point of even TRYING to get them to stop?" Ludwig sighed, "They'll argue everyday for the rest of their lives."

Francis laughed, "That's a lot of lovers' quarrels."

"We're NOT lovers!" Arthur and Alfred shouted at the Frenchman.

"Yet."

"Never."

Francis rolled his eyes, "I'm afraid you might be right. Arthur is too tsundere and Alfred is much too childish. You two need some serious l'amour help."

"Why the hell is everyone in denial?" Gilbert sighed.

"They're just afraid." Antonio replied, "That, and they don't realize how wonderful it is to be in a relationship." He leaned over to Lovi.

"Kiss me, and I'll shove my sword through your head."

The Spaniard kissed him anyway. He knew the older Vargas brother wouldn't actually hurt him.

"Fucking bastard."

He'd just cuss...

"Veh~ I wonder how much farther we have to go." Feliciano looked around, "I hope it's not too much further."

"We all hope that, Feliciano-kun." Kiku replied.

"Hmm..." Feliciano looked thoughtful and walked side by side with Kiku, "Ehi, Kiku, do you feel like we're being watched?"

"Hai." The Jap nodded, "I'm surprised you of all people noticed."

"What's THAT supposed to mean?" The younger Vargas brother pouted.

"It means you are as oblivious as you are innocent." Kiku answered.

"Now I don't know whether to feel insulted or not."

"Gomen'nasai."

"Hey, hey! Lookie!" Alfred exclaimed pointing ahead towards a city, "That's GOTTA be Midría, right?"

"Probably." Arthur nodded, "That IS where this road is supposed to lead to."

"Hopefully we'll be able to get some help." Ludwig sighed, "I want to get home as soon as possible." he looked around at the other eleven, "Okay, try to blend in, and don't make a scene."

"That'll be difficult for some people." Arthur huffed.

"This shall be interesting." Kiku chuckled as the twelve walked into Midría.

"Veh~ Welcome to Midría, the Pirate City." Feliciano said earning a few - read: eleven - looks. He quickly added, "It's what the sign said."

Learn to read, people!

"So, we're in a town full of fucking pirates." Lovino sighed, "Great."

"The pirates are fucking?" Francis asked from the background... He was ignored.

"I don't think you'll have any trouble fitting in, Lovino." Arthur began, "After all, most pirates are thieves, right?"

"Don't make me STEAL your life."

"Oh, God, the puns..." Alfred groaned.

"Look," Ludwig started, "let's just split up, and see if we can find out anything." he looked at Lovino, "Or I'm sure one of us- coughLovinocough- could practice their abilities."

"Yes, yes, I know. I fail as a thief." Lovino rolled his eyes, "I can't even pick a lock." he turned around and walked off.

"Everyone else, groups of two. I do not care how this is done, but no arguing."

Ludwig and Feliciano were one group, Group Two was Arthur and Alfred, the third group was Francis and Gilbert, there was Antonio and Kiku, and finally Ivan and Yao. They went off in different directions, but... Weren't there twelve? Only eleven adventurers have been sent off... Hmm...

"Um, hello? Miss Author? You forgot me!"

Oh... Sorry, Matthew... Why don't you just check out the stables over there? I'm sure you'll find something otherwise I wouldn't have thought about that.

"Well, okay."

Now stop breaking the fourth wall or something bad might happen. Also, don't tell the others.

"Yes, ma'am."

So, Matthew walked over to the nearby stables. Why? Because I told him to...

The Canadian looked around like the invisible guy he was. Nothing was there except some horses that didn't seem startled by him being there... Did they even notice him?

Anyway, Matthew decided it would be a good idea to trip and fall to the ground. He looked at the object he tripped over and smiled. It was a chest. There was just one question... Could he open it?

He decided there was no better time to try, and...

Tah-dah! It opened!

And whataya know? There was even a not.

Matthew Williams,

You were not forgotten.

"I think I like whoever's laying these around."

Wanna know what the other paper read? Of course you do...

Matthew Williams - Beastmaster

-Armor

Chest - Tunic of the Canadian

Feet - Boots of the Cheetah

Hands - Beastly Gloves

Legs - Leggings of the Unknown

-Weapon

Scythe

-Title

The Invisible Friend

-Other

Chameleon Cloak

Healing Kit

Horn of Animal Calls

Knife

And nothing amazing happens. Matthew just puts on the awesomeness.

"Nothing amazing ever happens to me..."

Because you broke the wall again, a puppy just died.

"..."

Lovino might not be able to pick locks, but if he wanted to, he could steal a hat off a lady's head or a watch off a man's wrist. In fact, several men were going to be wondering where their watches were, and Lovino was going to be selling a few things while laughing hysterically.

"So, what's in the chest?"

"A very expensive, rare jewel."

Lovino picked up a newspaper but didn't read it... In fact, he couldn't read it. For two reasons. One, it was in some sort of wierd language unknown to Earth. Two, he was much more interested in what was in the chest.

"How much do you think it'll sell for?"

"Maybe about 20 wafers."

"What?! That's, like, 20000000 kelbs."

Lovino was curious about this world's currency. He put the newspaper back and walked over to the men. One of them walked inside a building of some sort.

"Excuse me, sir."

"Whataya want?" The man asked rudely.

Lovino twitched but kept his cool, "I'm not from around here, and I was wondering if you could tell me about the currency."

"Currency is the same everywhere, kid. Didn't your mother teach you not to talk to strangers?"

Ouch...

"My mother is dead." Lovino admitted, "And I overheard you talking about kelbs and wafers. Back home we only use kelbs."

"You not going to leave me alone until I tell you, are you?"

"Why would I leave such a dashing man alone?" Lovino winked. He wanted to be on this guy's good side. The stranger looked scary.

The man chuckled, "Dashing, eh? that's a new one. Alright. Out here in the big world of Conroe, the Middle Kingdom, we use kelbs, trigs, dules, wafers, and connies. 100 kelbs is 1 trig. 100 trigs is 1 dule. 100 dules is 1 wafer. 100 wafers is 1 conny. Anything else?"

"What's in the chest? It must be pretty cool if it's worth 20 wafers." The Italian nodded towards it.

"It's a rare jewel." The man replied, "You seem like a nice kid. So, wait here while I go find a merchant. Guard this for me, will ya?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good boy."

The man left, and Lovino sighed, "People are gullible even here..." he picked up the chest and left.

It took Lovino a while, but he found a spot where he could stop and work on his lock picking skills. It was a small tavern called Washouts.

Ludwig and Feliciano had been walking around. They had eavesdropped and talked directly to people. One person decided it would be a good idea to bully Feliciano, but Ludwig quickly showed the stranger what a /bad/ idea that was.

"Ah! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't realize he was your lover! Please forgive!"

Feliciano, who was trembling behind Ludwig, blushed slightly. The German turned fifty shades of red, "For the love of- He's NOT my lover!"

"Oh? But you two would be so cute together." A random lady stated. Even people who didn't know them thought Ludwig and Feliciano should hook up...

"Ma'am, please don't make me hurt you." Ludwig sighed and blindly grabbed Feliciano's hand to drag him into a small tavern called Washouts.

Athur and Alfred had been too busy fighting with each other to find out much of anything. They even argued as they walked into a tavern... You know it already I'm sure. They went into Washouts.

Francis was hitting on Gilbert, and Gilbert was just hitting Francis. The paler punched the blonde into a tavern.

"Hey, Gil, I found our friends..."

"Good for you." The self-proclaimed awesomest person stormed into Washouts.

Antonio and Kiku didn't actually know each other very well. They had mutual friends, but... There was an awkward silence as they walked into Washouts.

Yao rushed blindly into a tavern trying to get away from the Scary One, but Ivan followed the Oldest One into Washouts without hesitation.

So, did you guess that they all met up with each other to discuss information? Yes, even Matthew was there. I didn't forget about him /this/ time.

Ludwig looked at the chest that had the Foumouthed Tsundere's undivided attention.

"Lovino, what in that?" The Natural Leader questioned.

"Supposedly some gem worth 20 wafers." Lovino replied.

"20 whats?" Antonio raised an eyebrow.

"Wafers. I found out about the currency." The older Vargas answered, "100 kelbs equals 1 trig. 100 trigs equals 1 dule. 100 dules equals 1 wafer. 100 wafers equals 1 conny." he paused, "Holy shit, I got it!" he picked inside the chest and almost went wide-eyed, "This is pretty..." he cleared his throat, "Anyway, I'll be right back. I gotta go sell this thing and, like, 20 watches." he jumped up, grabbed the chest, and left without waiting for a word from anyone else.

"Eto, should someone go with him?" Kiku questioned.

"... I think he'll be fine." Ludwig replied, "Anyway, I think we're going to have to go to the capital, so we can talk with the king."

"We'll have to take a boat to Wishton, aru." Yao stated, "then we'll have to walk the rest of the way."

"Veh~ I was a fool for cutting gym..." Feliciano sunk in his chair.

"The only ships here are pirate ships." Antonio spoke up, "We'll either have to pay a lot of money or... Borrow one without permission."

"Do we have any intention of returning it?" Ludwig questioned.

"... Maybe?"

"I wonder what Wishton is like." Arthur wondered out loud.

"It has a magic academy, aru." Yao replied, "So, a lot of people will probably be magic users, aru."

"You could get some practice in, Yao the Mage." Alfred laughed.

"Aiyaa..."

"Well, before we leave, we have to wait for Lovino-san." Kiku spoke up, "Also, I am curious about the class and title of Matthew-san."

"Oh, yea!" Alfred looked at his younger brother, "I completely forgot about that. So, Mattie, what are you?"

"A beastmaster. I'm the Invisible Friend." The Canadian replied happy that he was being noticed.

"Invisible?" Francis repeated, "Nonsense. Mattieu is not invisible. He's too adorable."

This earned a sweatdrop from most and an expression of jealousy from Gilbert... Why would Gilbert be jealous though?

"I hope Lovino hurries, da." Ivan began, "I'm very tired of waiting."

"I'm sure he'll be back soon, aru. then we can leave." Yao reassured.

"I just hope he doesn't get into any trouble." Antonio frowned worriedly.

"Veh~ Fratello can take care of himself." Feliciano stated, "And if he does happen to get in any trouble here, he can just flirt his way out."

"But that makes me jealous..." Antonio grimaced.

"Would you rather him be dead?" Arthur asked.

The Spaniard went wide-eyed, "My goodness, no! Definitely not!" he sighed, "I just don't want anyone getting the wrong idea."

"Glad to know you have so much faith in me."

Antonio looked back and smiled brightly. He jumped out of his seat and embraced Lovino, "Oh, mi amor, you're okay! You ARE okay, ¿sí? You didn't flirt with anyone, did you?"

Lovi tried to push his Spanish boyfriend away but failed miserably like always, "Yes, I'm okay, damn it! All I had to do was run from the pirate I stole the chest from! Now let the fuck go right this goddamn instant, tomato bastard!"

"¡No!"

"How much money did ya get?" Alfred asked.

"20 wafers, 52 dules, 18 trigs, and 30 kelbs."

"Hmph. Well, we know what the thief is here for." Arthur stuck his nose in the air.

"Hey! If not for me, you wouldn't even have 1 kelb!" The tsundere Italian retorted, "What have you done other than argue with almost everyone, Eyebrows?"

"Hey, don't pick on Artie." Alfred stood up, "That's MY job."

"Why I oughta-"

"Veh! Fighting each other won't get us anywhere." Feliciano interrupted, "It'll only give Luddy a headache, and then he'll yell at everyone. We don't want that, do we?"

"No, Feliciano..." Almost everyone replied.

"Then stop your fighting so we can borrow a ship to get to Wishton."

Ludwig raised an eyebrow and patted the usually oblivious Italian on the head, "Good work."

"Grazie~"

"Hmhm. It seems like Ludwig-san is rubbing off on Feliciano-kun." Kiku chuckled, "Very well." he stood up, "We should proceed now. I want to get home as soon as possible.

Everyone else who was sitting stood as well, and the twelve headed towards the docks.

_**End of Chapter**_

* * *

Yay, Matthew has his class and title now! Isn't that awesome? Whataya mean you don't know who Matthew is? He's that only Canadian! What's a Canadian? A person from Canada, moron... Where's Canada? Now of American, duh!

... you still don't know who I'm talking about? Well, fine. You're obviously not awesome enough to remember him.

Review? It'll make you awesomer, motivate me, and you'll win a cookie autographed by me!


	5. Chapter 5

Hi, friends! It's time for a new chapter of Trying To Get Home. What will happen in THIS exiting chapter? Insane Italians, flirty Frenchman, a halfling and a dwarf, and much more will be discovered. The fabulous, awesome me does not own Hetalia. Enjoy!

* * *

The docks of Midría were lacking pirates, but there were A LOT of ships.

"Which on should we choose?" Ivan questioned.

"Does it really matter?" Ludwig asked.

"I'd prefer one that doesn't stand out, aru." Yao replied.

"What about that one?" Matthew pointed at the smallest ship. It was still pretty big though...

"It will have to work." Ludwig nodded. Why did so many pirates have such flamboyant ships? It was like Feliks helped design them or something...

The twelve casually boarded the ship like they owned it. It seemed deserted until-

"Oi! Whataya think yer doin' on MY ship?" A female voice growled.

The twelve looked towards the voice and saw a male and female. They were incredibly short... The female, shorter than the male, had pointed ears while the male had an incredibly bushy beard... What were these people?

"What's wrong? Never seen a halfling and a dwarf before?" The female snapped, "Do you have any idea what ship you're on?"

"Um... yours?" Alfred guessed.

"Aye. Do you have any idea who /I/ am?"

"..."

"Thought not." The shorter of the strangers sighed, "I'm the great Tessa Rosalina Alleea!"

The male coughed.

"And this is my first and only mate, Silber Roe. He doesn't talk much." Tessa began. Her attitude quickly turned sour again, "Now WHAT are you doing on my ship?"

"Borrowing it without permission?" Antonio smiled sheepishly.

"Any intention of returnin' 'er?"

"... Maybe?"

"That sounds an awful lot like stealin' to me." Tessa glared, "I don't like thieves."

Lovino quickly averted his eyes to the very interesting ground.

"You're an odd pirate then, aren't you?" Arthur raised an eyebrow, "Are you sure pirating is really what you want?"

Tessa shuffled her feet, "A-Actually..." she shook her head, "No, it doesn't matter! Silber attack!"

Tao thought fast. He held his hands out, "B-Burning hands!"

A jet of searing flame shot from Yao's fingertips causing Silber to jump back wide-eyed.

"Eek! A magic user!" Tessa screeched, "A-Alright! You can have the ship! I never wanted to be a pirate anyway! I only wanted to be a baker!" she quickly fled the ship with Silber close behind her.

"Well, that was easy..." Alfred stated.

"Hate to be the barer of tedious questioned, but..." Arthur paused, "Does anyone know anything about ships?"

"Oh, I do!" Antonio grinned.

"We're all screwed." Lovino facepalmed, "Please tell me someone else know something..."

There was no reply from anyone.

"I.. I suppose that settles it then." Ludwig sighed, "As much as it pains me to say this... Antonio is- He's... While we're on the ship, Antonio's in charge..."

Needless to say, very few people like this dangerous idea.

"Wipe that fucking grin off your face, damn it." Lovino sighed.

"Nope." Antonio's grin broadened, "First, we need to see what sort of supplies are on the ship. We should probably split up and look around."

"Someone's demanding." Arthur scoffed.

"Isn't it the sexiest thing ever?" Lovino swooned... He earned a few strange looks.

"Riiight." Ludwig drawled out the word, "Well, while Lovino's busy swooning, the rest of you do as Antonio says."

As the others scurried off to several places, Antonio whispered in the normally tsundere Italian's ear, "why don't you and I locate the captain's room?"

"Aye, aye, captain." Lovino sighed as Antonio dragged him towards the room he suspected to be the captain's.

He was right.

However!

The sight of a familiar chest stopped Lovino.

"Hey, Lovi, what's wrong?" Antonio questioned disappointed at the lack of - ahem - movement.

"I think you should try opening that." Lovino replied motioning toward the black chest in the middle of the room.

"Eh?" The Spaniard tilted his head and stared at the object in question, "Now that you mention it, it kinda looks like the one Ludwig found in the forest."

"It also looks like the one I found."

Antonio sighed and sat in front of the chest. He glared at it for a few seconds deeming it the reason Lovino was no longer swooning over him, and opened it with the greatest of ease.

Antonio Fernandez-Carriedo,

Sorry for interrupting, but this might come in handy later.

Have fun~

Lovino twitched and mumbled something about perverts while Antonio picked up the next piece of paper.

Antonio Fernadez-Carriedo - Pirate

-Armor

Chest - Pirate's Tunic

Feet - Boots of the Quick

Hands - Calico Gloves

Legs - Leggings of Murderous Intent

-Weapon

Dagger - Dirk

Axe of Passion

-Title

The Passionate Fool

-Other

Backpack

Grappling Hook

Locks

Rope

Lovino turned around, "I guess you should change into that." he put his hand on the doorknob, but the pirate quickly - yet gently - threw him on the bed.

"But I might need your help, mi amor." Antonio climbed on top of him, "Think you can help?"

The thief blushed, "S-Sure thing, captain."

"So, while Antonio's busy fucking Lovino into a mattress, should we go over what we have?" Gilbert asked.

Feliciano twitched and turned bright red, "V-Veh... That's really not something I wanted to hear.

"Congratulations, Gil," Francis began, "you've managed to mentally scar Feli for life."

"Just saying it how it is." The gladiator shrugged.

"Bruder, behave yourself." Ludwig scolded, "And don't say something that will make Feliciano blush like that. it can't be healthy to turn that red, and it's very out of character for him to blush."

"Yea, it's his bro's job to blush like that," Alfred laughed, "but only for Antonio."

"Ngh. Ha! Antonio!"

Feliciano's blush somehow deepened, "C-Can we go somewhere else? Preferably somewhere that I CAN'T hear them..."

"J-Ja... Let's go back below deck..." Ludwig nodded.

"Told ya that's what they were doing."

"Shut up, Bruder."

"Kesesesese!"

Sooooo... They went below deck and decided to hang out in the kitchen. Feliciano was slowly turning a safe, un-red color and the constant twitching was beginning to cease.

"E-Eto..." Kiku, who was also very read, was getting over a very bad nosebleed, "We have enough to make the trip I believe."

"According to the map, Wishton isn't very far from here, aru." Yao added.

"We have lots of blankets and pillows that are clean~" The now un-red-and-not-twitching Felciano chirped.

"Alright. Plenty of food, blankets, and pillows, and it's a short trip." Ludwig summed up, "Anything else?"

"We probably won't be seeing much of 'Tonio and Lovino during this trip seeing as they'll probably be busy-"

"Say it, and I'll cut you into tiny pieces too small for the human eye to see, and I'll throw you into an oven to bake."

The other nine stared at the Italian, who was smiling sweetly, like he'd lost his mind. However, Gilbert knew better than to challenge the threat. He valued his life far too much.

"R-Right..." Gilbert took the opportunity to hide behind Francis.

"If he comes after you," The Frenchman began, "I'm not risking my life."

"I thought as much."

"Veh~ Who's hungry?"

"That depends on what we're eating." Alfred replied nervously, "It's not human, is it?"

"What? Don't be silly. I would never EAT a person."

"Didn't you just threaten to bake Gilbert?"

"Bake. Not eat. Just back and probably bury... Or should I fry him? Which would hurt more? Well, I guess it doesn't matter 'cause if I cut him up first, he'll already be dead, right? So, maybe I should just boil him."

"Um... Yea... Sure... Anyway, what are we having?"

"Pasta!"

"Oh."

"Do you not want pasta? I guess I could fix something else if you want."

"Nah. Pasta is fine. Just... Don't put any blood or anything in it, 'kay?"

"Hmm... Just this once I suppose."

'Wh-What?"

"Hee-hee~ Kidding. I'd never THINK of putting blood in MY gourmet food. That's just crazy."

"Feli, you're my atmosphere searching buddy, and I love you and all, but... I'm seriously starting to question your sanity..."

"At least /I/ don't gorge myself with disgusting, fattening hamburgers."

Arthur was more confused than ever, "Are Feliciano and Alfred about to start fighting?"

"Hai, it appears so." Kiku replied replied.

"Shouldn't we try stopping them?" Matthew spoke up.

"Sometimes it is good to fight, da?" Ivan answered.

"Those who never frown eventually break down." Yao added.

"Hey, hamburgers are totally delicious!"

"Yet you don't deny that they make you fat?"

"Well, all that pasta and bread and stuff that you Italians eat is supposed to make you fat as well, but neither you nor Lovino are."

"... See, after you've said that, I can't be angry at you. I've seen the error of my ways. Mi dispiace, Alfred."

"Yea, me too, Feli."

"Life makes no more sense." Gilbert sighed, "I've /never/ seen so many sides to Feli-kins in one day before..."

"Veh~"

After Antonio and Lovino decided to reunite with the other ten and the ten discovered the Spaniard's class and title, they set sail for Wishton the City of Magic.

"How long is this gonna take anyway?" Gilbert asked.

"A few days perhaps. Maybe a week." Yao replied vaguely.

"This is gonna be unawesome torture."

"Oh, c'mon, Gilly, how can you not love being on the ocean?" Antonio asked.

"Speak for yourself, Herr Pirate."

"Gilbert, mon cher, I'll be sure to keep you entertained to the best of my," Francis paused, "abilities."

The gladiator twitched, "No thanks."

"But, mon ange, why not? It could be fun, non?"

"Throwing you off the boat could be loads of fun."

"Why would you want to throw a creature as glorious as me into the filthy ocean?"

"And I'M the narcissistic one?"

"Oui."

"Hey, 'Tonio, would you get mad if I threw Frenchie off the ship?"

"¡No!"

"Qu- Quoi?! Non! I am simply too beautiful to be thrown into the ocean! I would be drenched! What pretty mademoiselle would love a drenched Frenchman?!"

"What Fraulein would love ANY Frenchman?" Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Especially when they could have someone as awesome as me?"

"Well," Francis wrapped one arm around the paler's waist and used the other one to left the shorter's chin, so red eyes met blue ones, "Maybe instead of a mademoiselle that I'm not interested in, I could have a self-confident albino that has held my attention for a very long time."

Gilbert turned bright red, "W-Was? Get your hands off me!" he pushed Francis away and stormed off below deck.

Francis, who nearly fell overboard, sighed, "What does a desperate man have to do to get his feelings across?"

"Veh~ Don't be discouraged, Francis." Feliciano appeared out of nowhere, "Gil loves you a lot. He just doesn't realize it yet."

"Want to help your big brother out?" Francis asked hopefully.

"I'd love to, but I've got my own romance problems to deal with."

"Good luck."

"You two~" Feliciano skipped down to the kitchen where he found Ludwig cooking something, "Hey, Luddy, whatcha cooking?"

"Wurst. Would you like some?"

Feliciano cringed slightly, "Oh, uh, no thanks. I'm not very hungry..."

The German turned towards the Italian, "Not hungry? Are you sick?" he walked over to the smaller and placed a palm over his friend's forehead, "You don't seem to have a fever."

"No, I'm not sick." Feliciano giggled. Ludwig was so cute when he was worried like this. the Italian began talking again, "I ate a while ago."

"Feliciano, you're nearly as bad as Alfred when it comes to being a bottomless pit." Ludwig sighed, "Honestly, where does all that food go?" he poked the brunette's stomach.

Feliciano giggled again, "That's something about me you'll never ever know."

"There's a lot about you I don't know." The German sighed.

The smaller tilted his head to side, "Like what?"

"Like..." the blonde paused, "Why don't you ever talk about your family in Italy?"

"... Fratello and I don't exactly see eye to eye with our living relatives, especially the ones in Italy." Feliciano began hesitantly, "They weren't very nice to fratello, and I didn't like that... So, one day, I suggested to Lovino that we move to America. He thought it as the best idea I had ever had."

"What did your family say?" Ludwig asked curiously.

the brunette coughed nervously, "W-Well, they, um, didn't... We didn't tell anyone. We just packed our stuff and left."

"You mean you ran away?" The blonde was astonished.

"Sí." Feliciano nodded, "It was worth it too. If we hadn't, I wouldn't have met you or Kiku or Francis or Antonio or Gilbert or- or any of the others. Plus- Plus, Lovino would never have found true love, and I wouldn't have ever- Mhn..." he trailed off realizing what he was about to say.

"Are you sure you're not sick?" Ludwig asked, "You always finish your sentences no matter what."

"Don't you think I talk too much?"

"Sometimes, but... I like the sound of your voice so it's okay." Ludwig blurted before his brain could register what was being said.

The duo blushed and stood in an awkward silence for a minute or two. Those minutes felt like eternity to both of them.

Finally, Feliciano laughed, "You don't sound half bad yourself."

Ludwig chuckled, "Why thank you."

_**End of Chapter**_

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Whoo-hoo! There's the end of chapter 5. Will Ludtz und Feli EVER get together? Will Gilly EVER realize that Franny isn't just messing with him? Find out this and more in upcoming chapters of Trying To Get Home!

Review, ¿por favor?


	6. Chapter 6

Hi, hi! GreenPurple18, who does not own Hetalia, here with another chapter of Trying To Get Home, but you obviously knew that, yes? So, what's happening in this chapter? Well... I'm not going to tell you... Do I EVER tell you? No, I don't. Read to find out!

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"No, you twit, I will not!" Arthur shouted for the billionth time.

"C'mon, Artie, please?" Alfred pleaded, "It'll be funny."

"We'd get in trouble." The other retorted, "Do you WANT Ludwig to yell at us again?!"

"It'll be worth it!"

"It's suicide!"

"When are you gonna let loose and have fun?"

"When are you gonna- Going to grow up and act your age?"

"The day I grow up is the day you kiss me." Alfred laughed.

"Really now?" Arthur smirked unbeknownst to the younger.

"Yup." Alfred nodded, "So, I guess I'll never grow- Waah! Mmnf!"

Arthur had grabbed Alfred's shirt in an attempt to pull the taller down. The Brit then proceeded to capture the American's lips with his own.

Alfred broke the kiss blushing a deep shade of red, "Wh-What did you do that for?"

"The day you grow up is the day I kiss you, right?" Arthur answered with a question of his own.

"So..." The younger paused to process the information, "You stole my first kiss 'cause you want me to grow up?"

"Your first... Oh, bollocks..."

Lovino sighed happily and snuggled closer to Antonio, "You should take control more often, damn it. It's sexy as hell."

"Will it make you swoon?" The Spaniard asked kissing the Italian's head.

"Only every-fucking-time." Lovi replied matter-of-factly.

"Well, don't mind if I do~"

"How can you be so bubbly and oblivious and cute one minute and then be demanding and controlling and sexy the next?"

"I enjoy turning you on. It's one of the great joys of my life."

"You're able to find great joy in everything."

"No, I'm not~ There are a few thing(people) that I can't stand."

"Like?"

"Kirkland..."

"Why do you two hate each other exactly?"

"Oh, it goes way back." Antonio began, "Our families have hates each other since the beginning of time."

"So, you two hate each other because your families don't get along?"

"We were influenced at an incredibly young age."

"Don't you think it's time to leave all that hatred behind?"

"... Nope. I'll stop hating Kirkland when you stop hating Ludwig."

"Hey, at least I have a REASON to hate him."

"Well, what's that reason?"

"... I'm a protective older brother, and I don't want Feliciano to get his heart stomped on..."

"Yea... That reason kinda beats mine by a lot, doesn't it?"

"Sí."

And so the Spaniard once again proceeded to turn on Lovino... And thus we change the scene again!

Kiku, Ivan, and Yao were just hanging out. Four people were obviously going to stay single during this adventure, and I don't know where the fourth one is... Maybe our invisible friend is talking to some fish or something...

"Aiyaa! I'll never master these spells!" Yao complained.

"Eto, perhaps a visit to the magic academy with help." Kiku stated.

"But what if we're attacked right now, aru?"

"Please don't jinx us, Yao-san..."

"You can just hide behind me, and I'll kill everything for you, da?"

"... Aiyaa..."

Kiku sighed, "I'm sure a trip to the magic academy is just what you need... I think."

"Kiku, why do you have to be so unsure about everything?"

"I'm Japanese."

"That's like saying that all Americans are hamburger-eating, capitalist idiots, aru."

"But, Yao, Americans ARE hamburger-eating, capitalist idiots," Ivan began, "especially Alfred."

"Even though we are all friends, most of us don't really get along, aru." Yao pointed out.

"Westerners have such strange ways of showing they care." Kiku added, "It all makes my head spin."

"Planning on moving back to Japan, aru?" Yao asked.

"Iie, I have made some very interesting friend, and I would hate to leave them." Kiku replied smiling.

"That's good. We would miss you as well." Ivan nodded, "Right, Yao?"

"Of course, aru!"

Matthew decided it would be a good idea to float around like the ghost he was.

"I-I'm not a ghost."

I swear to God, Matthew, if you don't stop breaking the fourth wall, I will make a- a seagull EAT you!"

"S-Sorry... Wait... What?"

You heard me, Mister!"

"I know, but... A seagull?"

I'll make Feliciano do something morbid to you! Or- Or I'll make Ludwig lecture you!"

"Shouldn't you be trying to get them together?"

It's a work in progress.

"Can't you do a time skip or something?"

But then people will get confused...

"I meant to Wishton. Nothing interesting happens during the rest of the trip, right?"

Dunno.

"But you're the author!"

I don't plan this stuff! No don't make me go down there!

"Isn't the fourth wall broken enough?"

"Veh~ Matthew, who are you talking to?"

"Eto, what's the fourth wall have to do with anything?"

Now they think you're crazy.

Matthew sighed, "Pretend you two never saw anything."

"... Westerners really ARE strange..."

"Veh~ I think it's just those from the North American continent..."

I swear, if Matthew keeps breaking the fourth wall, something bad will happen... Anyway, a few days later during the wonderful time we call night, random people that didn't look human decided it would be a good idea to sneak aboard the ship.

Now any other time this might have been a good idea, but this was NOT any other time. This time, the ship had an awesome lookout if you catch my meaning...

Gilbert the Gladiator came crashing down with his giant sword. He landed in front of the four creatures, "Well, you guys look real friendly."

These creatures were tall and emaciated. They seemed like skeletal humanoids with varying skin colors. Dirty gray to dull yellow. Long, dingy-brown hair flowed down their backs, over the very flamboyant armor.

"We are but a few of the pirates of Gith." One growled.

"We'll be taking you ship." A second cackled.

"Ha! Over my dead body." Gilbert snorted hoping that his confidence would scare them off.

"That can be arranged." A third pulled out a sword and two of the others did the same.

"Shit..." Gilbert avoided the attacks and attempted to strike back, but... He wasn't actually quite sure how to use a sword. The gladiator was backed towards the edge of the ship.

"Give up, and we may let you live."

"Heh. Hate to disappoint, but a Beilschmidt never goes down without a fight." He swung the blade and the three pirates of Gith jumped away, but... Gilbert looked around. Weren't there four? He put his eyes back on the remaining three, "Hey, where'd your unawesome friend go?"

"Look what I found in the kitchen."

The pirates and Gilbert looked towards the stairs that led to the belly of the ship, and the gladiator did /not/ like what he saw. The fourth Gith pirate had gone below and found Feliciano.

"G-Gil!" The frightened Italian tried to squirm out of the evil pirate's grasp, but his attempt was futile.

"Hey, let him go!" Gilbert shouted, "He's defenseless. That's not fair!"

"Who said anything about being fair?" Gith pirate 4 questioned holding a knife to Feliciano's neck.

"Magic missiles, aru!"

Gith pirate 4 was knocked forward, and Feliciano used the opportunity to escape and hide behind Gilbert.

"You okay, Feli-kins?" The paler asked as Yao, Ludwig, Kiku, Ivan, Alfred, Francis, and Arthur hurried from under the deck... Oh, and Matthew.

"Uh-huh." Feliciano nodded as Lovino and Antonio decided to make their entrance.

"Gee, Gilly, I thought for sure you'd be able to take care of them by yourself." Antonio chuckled.

"Shut up." Gilbert glared, "Not my fault they don't teach you how to use a sword in highschool. Plus, they had Feli-kins..."

This last statement slightly (read: immensely) pissed off Lovino, "Tch. Fucking messing with MY little brother... Who the hell do they think they are?"

"They have a magic user..." Gith pirate 3 backed away.

"It's only one, and it's obvious he's new at this." The first, who seemed like the leader, hissed.

"He probably only knows one or two spells." Gith Pirate 2 mocked.

"Man, you guys are really evil. Waking us up this late." Alfred yawned, "Can I just shoot 'em?"

"Can you even use a gun?" Arthur questioned.

"Yea. How do you think I saved you, Francis, and Mattie?"

"Dumb luck."

"Actually, you don't have to worry about them." Matthew spoke up, "They already left."

"Kesesese! I obviously scared them away!"

"You didn't even do anything, aru! You couldn't even attack them because they had Feliciano!"

"Hey, cool it, bros! I was obviously the hero! I threatened to shoot them, so they ran away like cowards."

Antonio sighed, "Actually, Lovi stole their weapons when no one was paying attention."

Yao, Gilbert, and Alfred looked at the tsundere Italian. Lovino held out the swords of the Pirates of Gith.

"What should we do with 'em?" Alfred asked motioning towards the swords.

"Keep them?" Ludwig suggested, "Maybe the three who haven't found a chest can use them."

"I don't want one." Feliciano cringed, "They're way to gaudy."

"I agree with Feli." Francis turned away from Lovino, "A man of my caliber can NOT be seen with such garish objects."

Ludwig almost facepalmed, "Is there any way to change your minds?"

"No." The Frenchman and normally oblivious Italian replied equally stubborn.

"What about you, Arthur?" The blonde German sighed.

"I don't think I'd find myself very comfortable with close combat..." The Brit replied nervously, "The IDEA of using a sword makes me quite nauseous."

"Very well." The Natural Leader rolled his eyes, "Lovino, you stole them, what do YOU suggest we do with them."

"Like my brother, I find them too terribly gaudy. No one would buy them. we should just lock them in a box or something, throw them into the ocean, and never even THINK of the awful looking things again."

"Any objections? Other ideas? Concerns?" Ludwig looked around only to see on one had a problem, "Alright then."

_**End of Chapter**_

* * *

They don't know how to use their weapons/magic... Will they ever learn? What will happen with Arthur and Alfred? Why does Lovino like to cuddle so much? Will any of these questions actually be answered? Stay tuned for the nect exciting chapter of Trying To Get Home!


	7. Chapter 7

Eh? Almost two weeks have past since my last upload? I'm sorry! Well, we're finally back with yet another chapter of Trying To Get home! I don't own Hetalia, but I think that's already been established! Enjoy~

* * *

After being attacked by the Gith pirates, no one was able to go back to sleep, and the tension was incredibly awkward between two certain people.

Alfred and Arthur were staring each other down, and both were blushing slightly. Neither knew what to say, so Francis spoke up, "Ah, I'm sorry, but I must ask. What is with the tension? I can't tell if it's sexual, simply awkward, or both."

"It's none of your sodding business, frogface." Arthur scoffed.

"I just want to help." Francis looked genuinely hurt.

"Francis, maybe it's best to let them sort out their problems by themselves." Matthew stated.

"But they are both so thick-headed, and neither know anything when it comes to the values of l'amour." Francis pouted.

"A hero doesn't need any help!" Alfred exclaimed.

"Why the bloody hell would I accept help from a frog?" Arthur monotoned.

You'll both end up coming to moi in due time..."

"Hahahahaha! Nope!"

"Don't make me laugh, ya wanker."

"Francis, please just give it up for now."

"... Alright, Mattieu..."

Francis went off to find Gilbert, and Matthew went off to... do... whatever it is that he does in his free time...

"Plot people's deaths..." Matthew whispered jokingly.

Shut up, and respect the fourth wall!

"Hm? Did you hear that?" Arthur questioned as the Canadian left.

"What?" Alfred raised an eyebrow.

"I thought I heard someone say to respect the fourth wall..."

"I think Mattie was talkin' about that earlier."

"This voice was too feminine to be him."

"You sure 'bout that? Mattie CAN sound a lot like a chick."

... I have nothing to say.

"Why do you always pick on your brother?"

"Why do you always pick on me?"

"Because it's fun."

"Exactly."

"Shut up, or I'll- I'll-"

"You'll what?"

"I'll kiss you again."

"Ha! You don't have the nerve to do that agai-"

Arthur proved him wrong. Very wrong. The Brit pressed a very forceful kiss on the younger's lips.

Luckily, there was no one else on deck, but Alfred pulled away anyway, "Geeze. That hurt..." his face was completely red.

"Hmph. You were asking for it." Arthur scoffed.

"If you keep kissing me, someone's gonna start thinking things." Alfred pointed out.

"So?"

This reply took the younger by surprise, "D-Don't you care?"

"Why should I?" The Brit shrugged, "What do you think they'd think?"

"Th-THat we're- That- That you-" Alfred began stuttering, "They already think you have c-certain feelings for me. They might think they're actually right..."

"Well, they ARE right." Arthur walked over to the edge of the ship to look out at the ocean, leaving a very surprised, very confused Alfred.

"Wh-What?" Alfred questioned quietly as he walked over to join the older. He looked at the Brit before sitting on the railing of the ship.

"If you fall overboard," Arthur began, "I'm not going to save you."

"But, Artie, I can't swim..."

"Well, you should probably be careful." Arthur leaned forward placing his hands on the wooden railing.

"Hope ya don't fall..."

"Oh? Won't you save me?"

"... No promises..."

"The hero would let someone drown?"

"If I go in after you we BOTH might drown... Or get eaten..."

"Well, I, for one, would follow you to the ends of the Earth."

Alfred blushed, "Arthur..."

"I mean it, Alfred." The Brit looked at him, "You're childish, and you can be quite conceited at times, but you're also smart and quite adorable."

The American went wide-eyed, "S-Smart? A-Adorable? I-I'm not either of those things..."

"I've seen your grades, you git." The green-eyed male retorted, "And have you LOOKED in a mirror lately? You the most adorable human I've EVER layed eyes on, love. If we weren't always bickering, I'd probably have cuddled you to death and back again."

"B-But I thought you hated me. You've said so several times."

"And you believed me?"

"What else was I supposed to think? You say really mean, hurtful things most of the time..."

Arthur sighed, "You're right, and I'm so sorry for every awful thing I've said and done to you." he paused, "In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if YOU hate ME."

Alfred finally looked at the Brit, Ya know... They say girls often like guys who treat them badly." he looked back at the ocean, "I guess the same is true for heroes..."

The Brit thought about the last sentence for a moment or two before smiling slightly, "Well, I just have one thing to say."

"What?"

Arthur tackled the younger, "You're so cute!"

The Brit's tackle caused Alfred to loose balance causing them both to fall off the boat...

Oh, dear...

Luckily, Antonio, Gilbert, and Francis were watching the scene. They ran up to the edge of the ship.

"Sacre bleu! They fell!" Francis cried.

"No shit, Sherlock Bonneyfoy!" Gilbert shouted.

Apparently, Antonio had the ability to pull rope out of thin air. He threw one end over the ship so the two who had fallen could grab it.

"Well, someone's a quick thinker." Gilbert stated.

"As much as I hate Kirkland..." The Spaniard trailed off.

The aforementioned Brit's head popped out of the water, and he looked around. He saw the rope but no sign of Alfred.

One-line Flashback

"But, Artie, I can't swim..."

End Flashback

"Dammit!" Arthur dove under the water to search for the younger.

"What's that crazy Brit doing?" Antonio asked.

"Where the hell is Alfred?" Gilbert looked around.

"..." Francis looked grimly at the ocean, "Alfred can't swim..."

Arthur swam to the rope with an unconscious Alfred in tow. the Brit grabbed the rope, "Oi! Pull us up!"

"A-Arthur?"

The Brit looked at Alfred, who was seemingly half-conscious, "Hold on, okay?"

"No problem..."

Once the Brit and American were safely on the ship, the older of the two began apologizing, "I'm so sorry, Alfred. You nearly drowned, and it was my fault. If I hadn't of tackled you like I did, that wouldn't have happened. he looked at the Bad Friends Trio with thankful eyes, "I-I want to thank you three. If not for you idiots, I don't know what would have happened... I don't even want to think about it."

"Don't thank the two of us." Francis motioned to himself and Gilbert.

"It was 'Tonio who was the fast thinker." The palest added.

Arthur stood up and looked at the Spaniard, who was frowning. the Brit, who did /not/ like this predicament, glared at Antonio, "Well, I suppose I should thank you especially..."

"Doesn't matter to me." The pirate shrugged.

"Really? Then I don't think I- Ouch!" Arthur glared down at Alfred, who had pinched his leg. The Brit huffed, "Fine, fine, we're grateful. Ow! Ugh... I'M grateful... Bloody hell..."

Antonio smirked, "Anything for a friend."

"Eh?"

"Al y yo are very good friends. We get along quite well."

"Thought so."

Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Alright. 'Tonio, why don't you go take out sexual tension on Feli's brother dearest?"

"I think he's trying to steal something from Ludwig." Antonio replied.

"Well, there's a show I wouldn't want to miss." Francis laughed.

"Hopefully, Ludtz does kill him too much. Gilbert started to go below deck, and Francis followed after.

"H-Hey! Don't leave me with the Brit!" Antonio ran to catch up.

Alfred stood and look at Arthur, "So..."

"I hope nothing like that ever happens again." The older stated.

"I know. It wasn't fun at all."

"Thanking to that Spanish wanker was the worst thing ever." the Brit scoffed.

Alfred rook the moment to facepalm, "Artie, I love you. I really do, but... Sometimes... I think you're more childish than me..."

"Don't be so ridiculous, love." Arthur rolled his eyes.

Ludwig couldn't find his other show... boot... thing... One minute it was on his foot, and the next it was gone. It was like it had disappeared...

"Feliciano, have you seen my other boot?"

"Nope~ Why?"

"I can't find it..." Ludwig looked at the Italian, who looked as innocent as always.

Feliciano made a sideways glance, smiled, looked at the German, and giggled, "Well, I hope you find it soon."

"I hope I do, too..." The taller sighed... Then it hit him, "Do you know where Lovino is?"

The smaller made a sideways glance again, "Veh~" he went up the stairs.

Ludwig was confused, and he tried to follow Feli's sideways glance. All he saw from his point of view, however, was an open door. He decided Lovino was in whatever room the door led to and walked into it.

Not only was he right about Lovino being in the room, but he was also right about the tsundere Italian having his boot. He sighed and looked around taking note that there was nothing but a bunch of boxes. His attention turned to the thief, "Any reason why you stole my boot?"

"You're the one who's telling me to fucking practice." Lovino shrugged nonchalantly.

"Well, yes, but I didn't mean for you to steal from your frie-"

"Shut the hell up." The Italian quickly interrupted wanting to stop that word. He and the potato bastard where NOT friends.

"Anyway," Ludwig began again, "we understand that you're a master thief. Don't you think you should work on another skill, like-"

"Like lock picking?" Lovino guessed tossing the boot to the German, who caught it with ease, "All the goddamn locks are already unlocked."

"I see." The taller put his boot on, "Well, maybe you should take a break. I doubt the others would appreciate their belongings going missing."

"And you suggest I do what?" Lovino groaned, "I'm fucking bored, and there's nothing to do, dammit."

The foul-mouthed tsundere and the natural leader left the room and walked up the stairs where they saw a drenched Alfred and Arthur, a sleeping Feliciano, a perverted Francis, an annoyed Gilbert, an oblivious Antonio, a bored Kiku, a kolkol'ing Ivan, and a yawning Yao.

"Um..."

Shut up, Matthew! You're invisible, remember? They can't see you!"

"Sad face..."

"I don't think you're the only bored one." Ludwid said to the agitated Italian.

"Oi, tomato bastard, about how much further?" Lovino called out.

"I dunno..." Antonio sighed as he looked up at the sky, "Anybody know when the sun came up?"

Nobody knew... Not even the awesome authoress...

Yao sighed, "Kiku, I'm bored, aru~"

"Eto, what would you like me to do about that?" Kiku questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Something cool." Yao replied, "Do a trick with your sword, aru."

"I would be happy to oblige if you only wished to fall over dead. A sword is meant for combat not petty tricks."

"Waah! Kiku's so mean, aru!"

"Huhu."

Ivan smiled, "Ah, how funny my friends are. 'Though Kiku can be kind of scary, da?"

"Eh?! What about me, aru?!"

"Nyet."

"Aiyaa..."

"Eto, please do not worry, Yao-san." Kiku began, "I believe you are exactly as you should be... A very UNIQUE individual..."

Tear of joy were building up in the eyes of the Chinese mage, who was smiling, "Kiku~" It took him a while to catch on, "Wait..." he twitched in annoyance, "What is that supposed to mean, aru?!

Kiku smiled politely, "What do you think it means?"

"I think you're insulting me, aru." Steam was starting to come from Yao's head. He was very annoyed.

"Who knows?" Kiku shrugged, a small smirk forming on his lips.

"Aiyaa! Kiku, where did your manners go?!"

Ivan laughed, "Seeing Kiku like this is very humorous, da?"

* * *

Kiku, what are you doing? Kiku, stop. Stop, Kiku... Review for a cookie?


End file.
